Johnny Dangerously

Johnny Dangerously
Dec. 21, 1984
Fox
Comedy, Historical, Action
VHS
B+

Although I think this was neglected by the critics at the time, thirty years later it has survived as one of the funniest movies of the '80s.  From its Weird Al theme song to its "crime pays a little" twist ending, it's a rollicking parody of '30s gangster movies with several stand-out performances.  Michael Keaton as the adjectively named title character is dead-on Cagney, with charm of his own.  (He's one of the sweetest gangsters in movie history.)  Maureen Stapleton as his mother (playing 29 in the early scenes, with no change in wardrobe or make-up, although she was then 59) is earthy and deadpan, while Griffin Dunne as his brother is noble and horny.  (Compare and contrast this to his Who's That Girl role three years later).  Joe Piscopo and Richard Dimitri are both very quotable as Johnny's rivals Danny Vermin ("Once!") and Roman Troy Moronie ("You fargin corksucker!").  Marilu Henner is of course sexy as Johnny's girl Lil, but she can also sing and do comedy.  She dresses as a nun in one scene, as she did that same year in Cannonball Run II (which I used to own).  Her Taxi costar Danny DeVito (who'd been in the sexy-women-dressing-as-nuns movie Going Ape! with their costar Tony Danza) appears as District Attorney Burr, who's run over by a malt liquor bull after hitting on Johnny, in one of many '80s references.  There are also '30s jokes of course, and even a slam on William Howard Taft.

Not every joke works, but even the ones that don't, like Dom DeLuise as the Pope, are done with such verve that I can't help smiling.  Much of the humor is sexual but the movie is too good-natured to be sleazy, even when it's tasteless.  If nothing else, you'll have a ball spotting all the cameos, like Dick Butkus as Arthur, Alan Hale, Jr. as the Desk Sergeant, and Ray Walston as the newstand vendor.

Cynthia Szigeti, who was a passenger in The Big Bus and Diner Doll Sophie in The Gong Show Movie, is Mrs. Capone here.  T-Shirt Vendor Jeffrey Weissman was Ringo Fan in I Wanna Hold Your Hand and Brainwashed Youth in Sgt. Pepper.  

Taylor Negron, who was Blond-Haired Man Auditioning in The Gong Show Movie, has another uncredited role here, as Delivery Man.  Helen Kelly seems to have had a lot of uncredited roles at that time, among them "Pod" Concert Viewer in Spinal Tap, Wife Visiting Prisoner here, and Woman at the Park in Girls Just Want to Have Fun.

This movie was directed by Amy Heckerling, then best known for Fast Times at Ridgemont High (which I don't own), and she would go on to direct and write Clueless (which I of course own).  Neal Israel, very briefly Hecklering's husband, as well as the director etc. of Americathon, plays Dr. Zillman in the  army-training film/Betty-Boop satire Your Testicles and You.

The Muppet Movie

The Muppet Movie
June 22, 1979
Henson Associates
Children's, Comedy, Musical
DVD
B-

I'll always have a soft spot for this first of what would become many Muppet movies, this one released when I was eleven.  Yet I will admit that it's not as good as I remembered.  One of its strengths is also its greatest weakness.  There are lots of celebrity cameos, some of whom I've tagged, but most of these people aren't given much to do.  After all, if you're going to cast Richard Pryor, can't you give him something funnier to do than sell balloons to Gonzo?  Even the Muppets, and there are many of them, are for the most part not being used to their full potential.

In fact, the best sequences are mostly in the first half hour, with either Kermit on his own, singing the still lovable "Rainbow Connection" and (still impressive) riding a bicycle, or singing and joking with Fozzie.  (My favorite quote is later though: "Bear left," "Right, frog.")  As they pick up more passengers, the energy diffuses.  (Unlike in James Frawley's Big Bus.)  There are moments here and there, like the psychedelic painting of the Studebaker, and the always wonderful voice of Orson Welles, but not enough to quite put this in the good, let alone great, category.

Charles Durning is Doc Hopper, while Austin Pendleton, who plays his assistant Max, was Fred the Professor (the one who gets Jackie Gleason among others high) in Skidoo.  Muppet performer Robert Payne was in Beach Party, back when he was known as Bobby.  Twenty-year-old Tim Burton (yes, that Tim Burton) was an uncredited Muppet performer.  Tommy Madden, who's One-Eyed Midget, was a hospital visitor in Rabbit Test.  H. B. Haggerty, who's a lumberjack here, would be Awful Abdul in Million Dollar Mystery.  If you haven't seen the movie before (or it's been awhile), I'll let you spot the rest of the cameos.

The second and the second-best song, "Movin' Right Along"

Sextette

Sextette
March 3, 1978
Crown International Pictures
Comedy, Musical
VHS
B-

From the opening lyrics that proclaim that Marlo Manners is "the female answer to Apollo" (I guess they didn't want to do a rhyme for "Venus") onward, this movie will have you scratching your head, shaking your head, dropping your jaw, and/or laughing affectionately and/or scornfully.  Even by the standards of an octogenarian Mae West sex comedy/ slash vanity production (if you thought they overdid the soft-focus on Lucy in Mame, you ain't seen nothin' yet), the movie makes little sense.  But if you start asking yourself questions like, "Why can't Marlo remember all her marriages and divorces?  Liz Taylor always managed it," or "Exactly how is this nutty scheme going to achieve world peace?", you probably won't be able to let go enough to get into the movie.  As it is, I can't say it's an enjoyably bad enough movie to hold up to more than a dozen viewings, but I still got things out of it this time, including of course being amused at the cast.

Of those I've tagged, three of them are Marlo's six (ish) husbands: Tony Curtis as Russian diplomat Alexei (hubby #2 or 3), Ringo as Polish (I think) film director Laszlo (#4), and George Hamilton as gangster Vance (#5).  (One husband, seen only in newspaper clippings, was a count.)  Number 6 (or 7) is Sir Michael Barrington, who turns out to be a spy.  Marlo's manager (Dom DeLuise) declares Sir MB is "bigger than 007," which would be ironic a dozen years later when Timothy Dalton (33 in '78) became James Bond.

As for Ken Hughes, he directed Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, which is fortunate because this is a musical.  True, some people (like Dalton) seem to be reciting lyrics more than singing, but then there are others, like DeLuise, who are giving it their all.  Most of these songs are of '60s and '70s vintage, like DeLuise's "Honey Pie" and Dalton's "Love Will Keep Us Together." The script by Herbert Baker, who also wrote the screenplay for The Girl Can't Help It, is based on West's 1961 screenplay.  I have to say that, as high a tolerance as I have for double entrendres and innuendos, even such chestnuts as West delivers here (yes, even the "gun in your pocket" one), it does get to be a bit one-note after awhile, which is why I went with a B- rather than a B.

George Raft plays a gangster named "George."  Seventy-year-old Rollin Moriyama, who's the Japanese delegate here, would soon be a Japanese doctor in Rabbit Test, then get his most famous role, as a taxi passenger in Foul Play, before becoming Chinese for Americathon.  One of the athletes, Kal Szkalak, would also be in Americathon.  Keith Allison, who plays a waiter, was apparently a '60s teen idol and famous enough to be one of the "guests at Heartland" at the end of Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band.  Alice Cooper, who's almost unrecognizable here (he plays the glass piano and is greeted as Alice by DeLuise), would have a much more important role in Sgt. Pepper.  Ed Beheler seems to have made a bit of a career impersonating President Carter, but this is the only one of his six movies I own.  There are appearances by "journalists" Rona Barrett, Regis Philbin, and Gil Stratton playing themselves.  And the soon to be late Keith Moon plays a mad dress designer.