Mermaids

Mermaids
December 14, 1990
Orion Pictures
Comedy, Drama, Romance, Historical, Musical
VHS
B

Based on a book I've never read, this movie has a more intelligent script than your average big Hollywood movie, even if it's only "a big movie" in comparison to my other films from 1990.  It's set the Fall through Spring of '63 and '64, in a lovely small town in Massachusetts.  The unconventional family of the Flaxes, 33-ish Rachel (played by 44-year-old Cher), her daughters 15-year-old Charlotte (19-year-old Winona Ryder) and 9-year-old Kate (10-year-old Christina Ricci in her big-screen debut) are somewhat nomadic, thanks to Rachel's restlessness and fear of commitment, but this time her daughters want to stay in one place.  Rachel's new boyfriend, the surprisingly sexy Lou (48-year-old Bob Hoskins), also wants them to stick around.  Meanwhile, Charlotte, despite her ambition to be a nun (although the Flaxes are Jewish), longs for 26-year-old Joe.

You can see why I've chosen so many genre labels.  As for "musical," it's not so much that everyone breaks into song (although Cher can be heard covering "The Shoop Shoop Song [It's in His Kiss]" over the closing credits, and in the music video on the VHS version), as that the songs set the various moods and help flesh out the time period.  By the time the Flax "girls" are clowning to "If You Want to Be Happy," you see what a journey they've been on, as a family and as individuals.  Even Kate has her own arc and, although she's far from a stereotypical little girl, it's clear why the one thing Rachel and Charlotte agree on is how lovable Kate is.  The dynamic between mother and older daughter is very well done, and I like how, although everyone is flawed, there are no villains here.  The direction, by Richard Benjamin, is overall solid.

It's not a great movie, and indeed this was only my third or fourth viewing, so I don't have a strong attachment to the film.  But I definitely recommend it, as long as (as with the other 1990 movies I own) you don't expect to be blown away, just entertained and maybe moved.  And you might just get some ideas for the next time you serve finger-foods.

Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure

Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure
February 17, 1989
Orion
Comedy, Sci-Fi, Historical
VHS
C+

Every time I start to watch this movie (and I've seen it a few times since the original theatrical release, when I was 21 and living in Southern California), I wonder why I never got around to watching the Bogus sequel.  There's that awesome Big Pig song "I Can't Break Away" playing over the then-cutting-edge visuals as the opening credits play.  And there's the Bill & Ted bromance.  (With a typically '80s touch of them cheerfully calling each other "fag" after they hug in relief.)  And there's George Carlin as the coolest big-screen Rufus since Groucho's Mr. Firefly.

But then there's that darn time-travel plot.  Nothing against time travel of course, but so little is done with it.  We're meant to find it automatically funny when two modern dudes travel into the past, which it sort of is.  But we're also meant to find it automatically funny when the historical figures enter modern (1988) San Dimas, CA (actually Arizona).  And it just isn't.  Part of the problem is that the writers (and of course Bill & Ted) seem to have only a superficial knowledge of who these figures are, so we get a Beethoven who can hear well enough to appreciate a synthesizer, and a Socrates who hits on girls at the mall.  And a Napoleon who loves water slides and sundaes?

At this point, the movie is most notable for truly putting Keanu Reeves on the map, and for paving the way for Wayne and Garth and so on.  Note, Stephen Herek would also direct Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead, about a very different Bush-Sr.-era teen.

Hal Landon, Jr., who plays Bill's father, was Cornfield in Scavenger Hunt.  Amy Stock was the nameless Girl in Bed in Soul Man, but she had since gotten married (becoming Amy Stock-Poynton) and worked her way up to the more memorable role of Bill's sexy young stepmother.  Philip V. Caruso (who seems to be primarily a still photographer) plays Dance Photographer here and would be War Commercial Photographer in Wag the Dog.

Radio Days

Radio Days
January 30, 1987
Orion
Comedy, Historical
VHS
C+

This is the movie that prompted Pauline Kael to say that Woody Allen had become the curator of his own childhood.  And this is not an interactive museum.  Yes, Allen kept us at a distance in Zelig, but that was a mockumentary.  There's no reason that his memories of his childhood have to be overly narrated.  After awhile, I wanted the Annie-Hall era Woody to snap, "Jesus, wouldn't it have been better to write a New Yorker essay?"  It's like Allen didn't trust his cast, including Seth Green as his sort of alter ego Joe (older than Allen would've been in the late '30s to mid '40s) and the potentially great Julie Kavner as Joe's mother, and had to keep hovering over them, presenting anecdotes, interjecting comments, and then drawing up the morals.  Yes, Alvy Singer jumped into his childhood memories, but to riff on them, and it was a free-for-all MSTing that others could join in on.

The movie is an ironic follow-up to Hannah and Her Sisters, with Dianne Weist again playing the sister who's the biggest screw-up.  (Renee Lippin as the other sister is utterly believable as being related to Kavner, and it doesn't hurt that she was Michelle on The Bob Newhart Show around the time Kavner was Brenda Morgenstern on Rhoda.)  This time Mia Farrow is cast against type as Sally, a dumb-blonde cigarette girl who rises to the top of radio.  For her, along with Tony Roberts, Jeff Daniels, Diane Keaton, and most of the other Woody-ites, this movie is only a reminder of better moments.

Not that the movie is bad.  It's just inoffensive and episodic, and even when you think there's going to be a pay-off (like that all the radio stars will end up trapped on the roof when Sally leads them up there), there isn't one, or not much of one.  I would recommend the movie for the cast and the way it sort of captures a time, but lower your expectations.  And I will note that this is the last Woody Allen movie I own; the next and last I saw was 1997's Deconstructing Harry and I found it hostile and unfunny.  This is comparatively warm, if luke-warm.

Hy Anzell, who's Mr. Waldbaum here, was Joey Nichols in Annie Hall, while Martin Rosenblatt, Mr. Needleman here, was Alvy's uncle there.  Among the unnamed radio voices, Norman Rose voiced "Death" in Love and Death, Wendell Craig was the Universal Newsreel Announcer in Zelig, and Dwight Weist was the Hearst Metronome Announcer in Zelig.  Kuno Sponholz plays a German in both Zelig and here, earlier as specifically ex-Nazi Oswald Pohl.  Also, Dimitri Vassilopoulos was Martinez in Zelig and Perfirio here (yes, even with that Greek-sounding name).

Sydney Blake, the Variety Reporter in The Purple Rose of Cairo, plays Miss Gordon here.  Of Purple Rose's penny pitchers, Peter Castellotti is Mr. Davis here and Paul Herman plays a burglar.  Michael Tucker, by this time on L.A. Law, is Joe's father Martin and had been Gil's agent in Purple Rose.  This time, Danny Aiello plays Rocco, a more sympathetic tough guy.  Ivan Kronenfeld was Lee's husband in Hannah and is On-the-Spot Newsman here, while Ira Wheeler was Dr. Abel there and the Sponsor here.  Mia's son Fletcher was a Thanksgiving Guest there and plays Andrew here.  Helen Miller was not only in the Purple Rose movie audience and played Mickey's mother in Hannah, but she's Mrs. Needleman here.

The other burglar, Mike Starr, would be Shipping Co-Worker in Who's That Girl.  Fred Melamed was Dr. Grey in Hannah, is Bradley here, and would be Caid of Assari in Ishtar.  Crystal Field was part of the movie audience in Purple Rose, is half of the Abercrombie Couple here, and would be Josephine Sanders in Tune in Tomorrow....

Having featured Mia's mom and the Marx Brothers' ex-co-star in Hannah, it seems appropriate that we here see A Night at the Opera's Kitty Carlisle, then 76.  Richard Portnow, playing Sy here, was First New York Wino in Roadie.  Wallace Shawn, who has a nice little role as the voice of the Masked Avenger, would shortly be more prominent in Nice Girls Don't Explode.

"My family liked to pose for pictures in the living room...."

Hannah and Her Sisters

Hannah and Her Sisters
March 14, 1986
Orion
Comedy, Drama
VHS
B-

When I saw this at 18, I was very annoyed with the audience when they (all of whom had been adults longer than I had) laughed at the argument between the characters played by Max Von Sydow and Barbara Hershey.  I found the movie a lot more profound then than I do now.  Yes, you might think that being middle-aged I'd identify with it more, but I think it's partly that I am middle-aged that I feel so impatient with these spoiled, unhappy, upper-middle-class characters.  I want to yell at the screen that they should all be nicer to Hannah (Mia Farrow), who's basically holding the family together.  That only a few years later Woody Allen would leave Farrow for Mia's adopted daughter (and perhaps abuse the very young daughter he adopted with Mia) has also made this film less enjoyable.  It's hard to watch Elliot (Michael Caine) cheat on Hannah with her sister Lee (Hershey's character).  And the jokes about "child molestation" don't help either.

This is not to say that the movie isn't still entertaining.  It is often funny and sometimes genuinely insightful.  The acting is overall solid, with the balance of comedy and drama generally good.  Farrow, Wiest, and Hershey don't look much alike ('80s perms aside), but they're believable as sisters, and of course Farrow's mother O'Sullivan is convincing as the mom.  I do have to say that Helen Miller and Leo Postrel (who were both part of the movie audience in Purple Rose of Cairo) steal the movie with their one scene as Mickey (the Woody character)'s parents, and I'm totally on the father's side when he says who cares what happens when he's dead, "I'll be unconscious."  Julie Kavner (then best known as TV's Rhoda's sister Brenda) also is good and down-to-earth in her scenes as Mickey's coworker Gail, my favorite line being the one about the black spot on his shirt.

But too often the movie takes itself as seriously as Mickey does, and even at 18 I wanted to watch Duck Soup more after that one clip.  Also, I've always felt that the 39 Steps are superior to Bobby Short, if what we see of them here is any indication.  But, yeah, those Thanksgiving dinners look like they might've been fun, if too angsty for my taste.

This time Woody regular John Doumanian is a Thanksgiving guest.  Ivan Kronenfeld, who plays Lee's husband, would be On-the-Spot Newsman in Radio Days.  Mia's son Fletcher Farrow Previn, who's a Thanksgiving guest here, would be Andrew there.  Fred Melamed is Dr. Grey here and would be Bradley there.  And Ira Wheeler, who's Dr. Abel, would be a Sponsor.  The nicest bit of casting is probably Tony Roberts again cast as Woody's friend who goes Hollywood, this time first contributing some sperm for Hannah's twins.

Daniel Stern was a Hare Krishna in One-Trick Pony but has a more prominent role here as Dusty the rock star.  Julia Louis-Dreyfus, who had just completed a stint on Saturday Night Live, appropriately shows up as part of the staff on Mickey's SNL-like TV show; she was then 25 and would soon play a recent college graduate in Soul Man.  William Sturgis, who's Elliot's Analyst, would be Franklin Benedict in The Royal Tenenbaums.  Carrie Fisher plays Lee's best friend "who steals her boyfriend."

Save me a drumstick and don't seat me next to Ichabod Crane.

The Purple Rose of Cairo

The Purple Rose of Cairo
March 1, 1985
Orion
Comedy, Drama, Romance, Historical, Fantasy
VHS
B

Although this is not at all a sequel to Zelig, and Broadway Danny Rose (which I've never cared for) was released in the interval, this is in some ways Woody Allen's follow-up to the quirky 1983 movie.  It's set later in the '30s (Top Hat, which we see a clip from, was released in '35), and the grimness of the Depression real world contrasts with the shiny, sleek onscreen world.  The main character, Cecelia (Mia Farrow), who loses her job at a diner and has a jerk of a husband (well played, perhaps too well, by Danny Aiello), escapes to that film world as often as she can.  And then one day one of the characters on the screen wants to explore her world, because he's fallen in love with her.  What will this mean in her life, and in the two-dimensional black & white lives he leaves behind?

Allen does a good job working out the ramifications, including when the real (but essentially fake) actor who plays the straying character shows up in Cecelia's town to get his alter ego back where he belongs.  (Jeff Daniels does a fine job of distinguishing naive but heroic Tom from charming but two-faced Gil.)  Unlike some other good '80s movies (notably Tootsie), there aren't any loose ends.  I admit to hating the ending when I was 17, especially since I adored the movie-within-a-movie (a note perfect parody/tribute to '30s society comedies).  I wanted Cecelia to stay with Tom Baxter, and live onscreen.  My favorite scene was and is when Cecelia enters Tom's world and innocently creates as much chaos as he's created in her world.  There's a night-life montage that I now suspect that Down with Love (2003), which is set in 1962, is paying homage to as much as it is to similar montages in non-parodies.  (There's a reference there to Woody Allen as a stand-up comic.)

But Allen's point, admittedly bleak, is that no matter how out of touch Cecelia is with reality, she can't fully live in the world of fantasy.  If this meant Cecelia doing something constructive with her life, then I'd support that point.  But let's face it, Woody doesn't give her any good options.  Even if she were to stay onscreen, the film is about to be burned and she would, along with Tom and his friends, "die."  (Unless there's resurrection later, on television and eventually VHS, DVD, and Blue-Ray?)  Gil the actor would never take her to Hollywood, and even if he did, she wouldn't fit in there.  So she's left with her unemployed husband, who drinks, cheats, and beats her.  At best, she might be able to stay with her sister (Stephanie Farrow again typecast but very good), but her sister has kids and probably not much more money than Cecelia.

The thing is, Allen could've had Cecelia boarding a bus to somewhere else, starting a new life on her own.  But that's not who she is, and she wouldn't necessarily find happiness that way either.  Her only happiness in the end is watching Fred & Ginger light up the screen.  That I wish that she could step into that movie and never look back shows that at heart I'm just as much of a sentimental movie fan as Cecelia.

As always, Woody reuses actors and actresses.  Loretta Tupper, who plays the Music Store Owner, is recognizable at 78 as one of the old ladies giving Alvy advice in Annie Hall.  Ken Chapin was an interviewer in Zelig and a reporter here.  Deborah Rush, Lita Fox in Zelig, gives a solid Jean-Harlowish performance as brassy but soft-hearted blonde Rita.  Sydney Blake, who's the Variety Reporter, would be Miss Gordon in Radio Days.  Of the Penny Pitchers, Peter Castellotti and Paul Herman would in Radio Days be respectively Mr. Davis and a burglar, while Rick Petrucelli was one of the Italians bugging Alvy in Annie Hall.  Of the onscreen movie audience, Crystal Field would be half of the Abercrombie couple in Radio Days and George Hamlin was Experimental Drugs Doctor in Zelig.  Helen Miller and Leo Postrel would be Mickey's parents in Hannah and Her Sisters.  And of course Dianne Wiest, playing Emma the hooker here, would be Hannah's sister Holly.

Milo O'Shea, who has had many roles, including as Dr. Jameson in Digby, is Father Donnelly here.

"I just met a wonderful new man.  He's fictional, but you can't have everything."

Zelig

Zelig
July 15, 1983
Orion
Comedy, Historical, Romance
VHS
B+

As with Annie Hall, I saw this at the time.  But I was 15 by then and visiting New York for the first and only time.  My aunt, cousin, and I knew only (I think from The Village Voice) that a new Woody Allen movie was premiering that night, but we stood on line and had such a good time that we stayed for the second showing.  (I'm surprised we weren't kicked out, but I think theaters weren't as strict back then.)  Even now, I remember lines that were hilarious then and still funny now, like "She's elderly and uses her wrist a lot" and "It was nothing like the movie."

This mockumentary (released a few months before This Is Spinal Tap) is about the influence of the media on society and vice versa.  Not only do we get this documentary on the life of fictional but almost believable Leonard Zelig, "the human chameleon," but the documentary contains faked newsreel footage and scenes from the imaginary 1935 biopic, as well as radio broadcasts, newspaper editorials, toys and games, and wonderful songs.  (The best of the lot is probably "Chameleon Days," sung by the one and only Mae Questel, the voice of Betty Boop, who lived another 15 years, dying at almost 90.)   There are also modern-day interviews with people who knew or at least met Zelig, my favorite being Ellen Garrison as the older Dr. Eudora Fletcher.  The young Dr. Fletcher, who cures him and loves him, is played by Woody's then girlfriend, Mia Farrow.  She's quite good here and they're sweet together.  You just have to block out what happened to them later in life, although that's hard when Leonard gets caught up in many scandals, including marital ones.

When I said Annie Hall was probably my favorite Woody Allen movie, I wasn't completely wrong, although I'm giving this a B+ as well.  This is technically a better movie-- and all the more impressive for being pre-Forest-Gump among others.  But by its very nature, this film keeps us at a distance.  Even when the illusion is almost shattered, as in the interview of Dr. Fletcher's mother where the old lady says all the wrong things but the interview is released anyway, we're never not aware this is a movie, while we're practically in bed with Alvy and Annie.  In fact, it takes awhile to even hear Zelig's voice here, while Alvy talks to us right away.  Instead, our main contact is the earnest British narrator, who pronounces "Anti-Semite" with a long E.  (Even in '83, I wasn't sure if this was deliberate.)  All these layers of film (in several senses) make for a very interesting movie, but the movies I love don't hold me at arm's length.

The archive footage has many, many recognizable faces, among them, Adolphe Menjou more than forty years after he appeared in Turnabout, and Dolores del Rio half a century after starring in Flying Down to Rio.

Although this doesn't have nearly as many performers who went on to greater things as Jeff Goldblum et al in Annie Hall, there are some folks that Woody Allen would use again later in the '80s.  Wendell Craig, who's the Universal Newsreel Announcer, would go on to be a radio voice in Woody's Radio Days, while Hearst Metronome Announcer Dwight Weist would be the Pearl Harbor Announcer in the later film.  Dimitri Vassilopoulos, who's Martinez here, would be Perfirio in Radio D, despite his Greek-sounding name.  Paula Trueman, who was a street stranger in Annie Hall, is Woman on Telephone here, and she was Stick-up Lady in Can't Stop the Music during that gap.  John Doumanian was a semi-regular in Woody's movies, appearing as Coke Fiend in Annie Hall, a Greek waiter here, and a Thanksgiving guest in Hannah and Her Sisters, among other appearances.  Ken Chapin is On-Camera Interviewer here and would be a reporter in The Purple Rose of Cairo.   Peter McRobbie, the Workers Rally Speaker, aptly plays The Communist in that movie.  George Hamlin is Experimental Drugs Doctor here and would be part of the movie audience there.

Deborah Rush has more prominent, although still minor roles, as Lita Fox here and Rita in Purple Rose.  John Rothman, who has the supporting role of Paul Deghuee, would be Mr. Hirsch's lawyer in Purple Rose.  And Mia's younger sister Stephanie not only plays her sister Meryl here, but they would have some other nice sisterly moments in Purple Rose.

Keeping cool with Coolidge